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By Park Gi-hyun
You might have come across the following remarks if you are a mother of boys. "You must be physically exhausted," "you need to be strong to control two energetic creatures" and "you will probably want a daughter at some point." As a mother of two boys, I continuously and actually, unwillingly have this conversation with others once I say I am a mother of boys. A growing number of couples prefer a girl over a boy because many good things about raising a daughter have come into the spotlight these days. Yet, I opine that it is not as bad as we typically believe.
Raising a boy is undeniably challenging, especially in terms of the physical aspects. Boys tend to be wild and adventurous. Boys are crazy about physical activities, which means raising them is physically demanding. However, there is always something bright around the corner.
Less emotional turmoil is the obvious trait of a boy. Boys tend not to be swayed by emotions, thus there is little need to comfort their moods. Giving them a guide in a logical and clear sentence is enough to change their behavior. Yet, your instructions must be straightforward and be given repetitively until they master them. I should not generalize, but from my experience, disciplining boys has been manageable.
Another good thing is self-development. The way our brain works differs by gender, meaning I am destined to have trouble understanding a boy's way of thinking. I find it very hard to get a good grasp of their behavior. It is very challenging, but at the same time, it is very fulfilling. The steps to understanding another type of human consist of patience, persistence and love. I have raised two boys for nearly eight years. Now I perceive myself as a more patient and mature person. Two boys have made me stronger, nudging me to try new things with less hesitancy.
Fortunately, my attempts at understanding have helped me to get a better sense of my husband's behavior too, as he has a similar brain structure to that of my boys, minimizing disputes and, thankfully, bringing us closer together.
Recently, the birthrate in Korea hit another record low. According to Statistics Korea, the nation's fertility rate or the average number of children for a woman aged 15-49 fell to 0.78 percent in 2022, one of the lowest. The notion that child rearing largely constitutes endless sacrifice and dedication is misguided. Instead, you grow up with your child. Plus, raising your child comprises countless upbeat moments. I am certain that the joy of raising a child far outweighs not having a child at all. Do not be afraid of becoming a mother, especially a mother of boys. It is challenging but gratifying, and most importantly, very valuable.
I root for those mothers of boys who are struggling to comprehend and discipline their sons at this very moment. I am surely one of them. Raising kids is very hard, but it is incredibly precious. Maybe that is why sharing my thoughts on kids now makes me miss my boys, one in elementary school and one in kindergarten. So, I will spare energy to hang out with my boisterous boys once I return home.
The writer (faith0906@gmail.com) is a freelance English translator based in Korea.